JUVENILE SIREN IMPERSONATOR GROUNDED AFTER STOPPING HUNDREDS OF CARS IN FRONT OF SCHOOL

Drivers in front of Efrem Zimbalist
Elementary School stop Tuesday
after hearing what they
thought was a siren

A young miscreant who has the uncanny ability to imitate an emergency vehicle siren has been grounded by his parents until his voice changes.  Police say 11-year-old Scout Wolgomott hid behind a tree at his elementary school and used his prowess to pull more than 250 vehicles to the side of the road.   

Scout’s parents, Elka VanTeague-Wolgomott and her husband Chance said they are very disappointed in him.  “We didn’t raise him like this,” said Chance Wolgomott, who added that Scout first denied involvement but told the truth after being threatened with waterboarding.  “Two years in his room should make him think about what he’s done,” said his mother Elka, whose jeans were so tight she couldn’t fit her hands into her pockets.  

A contrite Scout Wolgomott admits his guilt to his disappointed parents 

The Wolgomotts also said they have no excuse when police pointed out the existence of two smoke detectors in their dining room. “You only need one in a room,” asserted police officer Alejandro Ng.  “Honest to God, I never noticed it before,” claimed a nervous Chance.   

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