Astronaut Who Returned to Earth Nearly Two Feet Taller Thankful For Neighbor’s Pickup Truck

Astronaut Scott Kelly, who gained nearly two-feet in height during his 340-days aboard the International Space Station, told reporters yesterday that he would have been “stuck at home” for several days after his return to Earth if not for Larry, his next-door neighbor.

“He saved my ass,” said Kelly, who added that his height prevented him from driving his Chevrolet Tahoe.  “I had to lay down in the bed of Larry’s F-250 pickup while he drove me around,” he related.  “Fortunately, he’s got the long bed.”

Kelly also sported a noticeable bruise on his forehead that he attributed to whacking his head on his home’s door frames.  “I’ll sure be glad when I shrink back to my original height, I’ll tell you that,” said a frustrated Kelly.

According to Nasa spokesman Darvon Styx, the astronaut should return to his normal 5’6″ height in a few more days.  Until then, he’s thankful for his good neighbor Larry.  “He’s a hell of a guy,” said Kelly. “I definitely owe him a six-pack of beer.”