Updated on September 20, 2017
NASA Spacecraft Finally Supasses Mileage of Local Man’s Old Toyota Pickup
It took NASA’s New Horizons spacecraft nearly ten years of flying through the emptiness of space to accomplish it, but the piano-sized probe (believe me, we tried to come up with another term) finally surpassed the distance record set by Kelp Raffee’s 1989 Toyota pickup.
Kelp Raffee poses with his Toyota pickup. Note the timing built hanging from the mirror
After blowing past Pluto at nearly 31,000 mph back in 2015, the New Horizons craft kept going, and last Thursday, it claimed the record of 3,437,956,122.8 miles, overtaking Raffee’s mustard-colored Toyota.
While New Horizons cost $728 billion to build and launch, Raffee complained to Parksplug that he recently had to spend $391 for a new timing belt. “And I suppose I’ll have to buy another damn belt in another 28 years,” he groused.
