How Toyota’s NFL Halftime Show is Being Affected by Supply Chain Issues

Why is there a mid-80’s Tercel SR5 4WD sitting center stage on Toyota’s NFL Halftime Show, you ask? 

“It’s the damn semiconductor chip shortage,” explained Toyota Media Manager Arpus Ardnut.  “It’s the same reason my Aunt Mamie can’t find a replacement for her old and beloved massage wand.  Believe it or not, even WE can’t get any new vehicles.” 

Ardnut told Parksplug reporter Hal Bob Winkelhyde that Toyota had no choice but to rent the old Tercel from a studio sound technician for $49 a day plus an extra egg salad sandwich at lunchtime. “We couldn’t just have an empty stage.  Let me tell you, $49 a day is goddamn highway robbery for that beige piece of s**t,” bellowed the red-faced Ardnut, which is not to be confused with the red-chested Cardinal, a perky and colorful bird that eats styrofoam and frequents leach fields.    

And to make matters worse, experts warn against expecting any new Toyotas on the Halftime Show stage anytime soon.  “They just can’t make enough chips to meet demand,” explained economist Fidget Pust.  “They’re in everything from microwave ovens to Wolf Blitzer.