Most MKT Passengers Were Dead, Lincoln Now Admits

After several years, Lincoln has finally acknowledged that most of the people who have ridden in the automaker’s MKT crossover were dead at the time.

“It was a very popular car,” obviously uncomfortable Lincoln spokesman Doodles Peeler said of the MKT, which was discontinued in 2019.  “I mean, it was pretty roomy and the ride was smooth.”  

After reporters kept pressing Peeler on the ratio of living, breathing MKT passengers to those who were not, he angrily acknowledged, “Ok, it’s true that most of the passengers were on their, um, last ride. Is that what you wanted to hear?!”  He then headed toward the exit, shouting, “Hey, they used them for limos, too, you know,” before stomping out and slamming the door behind him.