California to Switch to Paper Airbags

The State of California is banning nylon airbags for vehicles and mandating that all cars sold in the state come equipped with paper airbags, according to a source who requested anonymity but is nevertheless being identified by Parksplug as 34-year-old state congressional aide Louis “Louie” Lewey, who said he had to go.

“The problem with nylon is that in order to recycle it you first have to grind it up into teeny little pellets using a small hand-crank meat grinder, which is very labor intensive,” Lewey said.

It is not yet known if vehicle manufacturers will supply the paper bags or if customers will be required to provide their own.