Updated on November 5, 2015
CHANGE IN MAIL DELIVERY MEANS POST OFFICE WON’T BUY FLEET OF NEW TRUCKS AFTER ALL
POSTAL SERVICE TO BEGIN DELIVERING ALL MAIL TO SOME GUY NAMED STEVE
Just days after the financially struggling U.S. Postal Service proposed buying a fleet of 180,000 new trucks, officials abandoned the plan, acknowledging they really don’t have the money to deliver the mail at all.
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| Steve’s house |
“We lost $2 billion in the last quarter, so how can we afford new trucks?” post office spokesman Dewey Gooch asked rhetorically and even a little bombastically. Instead, the agency will cease all delivery to homes and businesses, and mail will be dropped off at the home of some guy named Steve.
“We’ll deliver everything to Steve’s house and the American public can pick up their mail there,” said Gooch, adding, “We feel bad about it, but Steve’s a nice guy and we think people will like him.”
Contacted by Parksplug, Steve said he’s happy to help out. When we asked where he will store mail for more than 300-million people, Steve replied, “I’ve got a couple of spare rooms and a shed, so I don’t think it will be a problem.”
Gooch said the public can begin picking up their mail at Steve’s house beginning June 1st. “You know where that Shell station is over there on 148th? Take the first right just past that and Steve’s house is the white one on the left.”
