Revealed! First Photo of BMW’s New M-ish Lineup!

Cheaper M-ish Models to Join High-Performance “M” Vehicles

For months, BMW officials have denied rumors that a line of more affordable — yet less powerful — M-ish vehicles  will join existing “M” models.  Now there’s proof.

Parksplug photographer Cheerio Pulgas, wearing a life-size, inflatable Isetta disguise, staked out BMW’s Munich headquarters and after nearly three weeks, was finally able to snap the mediocre photo of the prototype M-ish   3-Series shown here.  No wait, it somehow ended up down there.

So, how do M-ish models differ from M-badged vehicles?  To better illustrate this, Parksplug created a table. Then we placed the computer and keyboard on the table and typed the following details:

ENGINE:  Both will feature 425-horsepower 3.0 liter inline six-cylinder engines, but the M-ish will come standard with a vacuum leak, so it’s not as powerful as the more expensive M3.

TRANSMISSION:  The M3 features a either a six-speed manual or a double-clutch automatic.  The sole transmission available in the M-ish is a continuously variable unit with inoperable shift paddles mounted on the steering wheel.

FUEL EFFICIENCY:  The M3 is equipped with an auto stop/start feature while the M-ish features only auto stop. The driver must manually restart the engine when the light turns green.

APPEARANCE:  Simply put, the M3 is much sportier looking than the M-ish 3-Series.  While the M3 boasts a carbon fiber body kit, the M-ish makes do with cut-rate denim fiber pieces.

INTERIOR:  The M3 comes standard with heavily bolstered sport seats that are more comfortable than they look. The much improved i-Drive system includes standard navigation system and will automatically take control of the vehicle should you need to lift a cheek to rip a rumbler while drifting through the curves.  On the other hand, perched atop the M-ish‘s leatherette-sprayed dashboard is a four-inch screen with a fixed map of New Hampshire.

PRICE:  As noted above, M-ish vehicles base prices will be lower. For example, the 2017 M3 starts at $64,000, but, with options, typically stickers at around $147,000.  The 3-Series M-ish should cost dozens of dollars less.