Category: Uncategorized
Updated on April 2, 2020
Say It Ain’t So! 707-Horsepower Hellcat Replaced by Four-Cylinder “Housecat”
Mopar fans are up in arms following Chrysler Fiat’s announcement today that the supercharged 707-horsepower Hellcat V8 engine, a popular option for Dodge Charger and Challenger models, will be discontinued. A spokesperson for the automaker said the Hellcat will be replaced by… Read More
Updated on March 13, 2020
First Photo: 2020 Shelby Transit Connect
It’s the news that many (four or five) Transit Connect fanboys have been waiting for: Ford has announced it will produce a Shelby version of the compact van! And Parksplug has the first photo of the hot rod TranCon…but just… Read More
Updated on February 25, 2020
Engineers Dispute Claims About Electric Vehicle Additives
Drivers of electric vehicles might be tempted by claims from makers of newly-marketed electricity additives. But one engineer has a message for consumers–save your money. “A bottle of injector cleaner might make your Chevy Tahoe’s engine run… Read More
Updated on February 17, 2020
On Eve of Big Auto Show, Automakers Still Trying to Figure Out Just Where the Hell Geneva Is
Weeks before the start of the Geneva International Auto Show, a number of automakers are still trying to figure out where Geneva is. “Is it in Canada?” asked Ford spokesman Siefert Langhorn. “Crap, we should have started looking this up months ago.” “We wanted… Read More
Updated on January 29, 2020
From Now On, Horsepower and Torque Will Be the Same Thing
Automotive engineers say they’ve “had it up to here” with trying to explain the difference to the general public. “We’ve explained and explained until we’re blue in the face,” said exasperated automotive engineer Aroma Sue Crouch. “We give… Read More
Updated on January 24, 2020
BMW TO SUPPLEMENT OLD BLUE-AND-WHITE LOGO WITH ACTUAL SPINNING PROPELLER
BMW’s optional spinning propeller. The company recommends waiting until it stops spinning to open the hood Despite the fact it’s a myth that BMW’s iconic blue and white logo represents a spinning propeller, the company has decided to offer an… Read More
Updated on January 24, 2020
Honda: “Here’s Your F**king Volume Knob!
Honda is apparently tired of complaints about the lack of volume knobs on their vehicles’ audio systems. At a press conference today to show off the 2020 Civic, a reporter asked Honda spokesperson Howdy Kanute if the sporty compact finally… Read More
Updated on January 16, 2020
FORMER PALM READER SWITCHES TO STUDYING TIRE GROOVES
10 years ago, Gushie Blair left a successful career as a reptile cremation specialist to become a palm reader. Now, she’s about to steer her career in yet another direction: tire reading. “It’s all about interpreting the character… Read More
Updated on January 7, 2020
Here’s the Poop on Ferrari’s Upcoming LaFerrari Successor!
Ferrari has confirmed it will indeed build a new hypercar to succeed its vaunted LaFerrari. After several days of trying, we were finally able to get in touch with Ferrari spokesperson Cervelli Fritti, who explained that “vaunted” means… Read More
Updated on January 2, 2020
Breaking News! Tony Retires; FIAT Changing its Name to FIAF
Everyone’s heard the old adage that FIAT stands for “Fix It Again Tony.” But we didn’t realize it was true until now. Fiat announced today that Tony has retired, and is being replaced by veteran mechanic Francesco Grimaldi,… Read More
